Of Friends and Struggles


 I’ve known her from a couple of years ago but back then until last June we’re still stranger to each other since we know each other before just by the faces. Back then, it never occurred to me that this person will be a big part of my life. I could say that all the troubles I’ve been through wouldn’t be as easy to handle if it weren’t for her being there for me.  And I believe that a “thank you” wouldn’t be enough; I decided to write this story? Or rather a short essay about her… about us. And so here goes the story of a woman who could look really simple but behind lays a woman of a great heart…         


 It was our first day of school as fourth year students. It goes the same every year and yet, that morning I feel rather nervous and totally different. Was it because I am not with my usual classmates anymore? Or was it my intuition working again telling me that something is about to happen? I cannot remember the answer anymore but all I can remember is that, that day marks the beginning of a totally different path, environment and a change in almost everything even to myself.            

        As it is, first day run the usual…you got to meet your professors, fill up class cards, do groupings for group reports etc. I call them the first day of school rituals. I would say it went okay though I felt a bit uneasy in the grouping thing since I don’t really know my classmates aside from knowing their names and faces. I never I got to know them before to the real sense of the word because I was with my two friends when I first join their class and back then, it feels like there is no need for me to widen my horizon and make new friends. Or maybe I am just not a very friendly type of person. Well, back to my story, I feel a bit uneasy joining groups with my classmate since I haven’t build a rapport with them yet. Aside from that, I feel really out of place since everyone is chatting about so-so topics I cannot even relate. At last, the first subject was through. We move to our next subject right after and the grouping goes again. Luckily, this time one of the member of the group were I was listed was my seatmate when I first join this class and somehow it made me feel comfortable. And this group made me found home to be with throughout the rest of the semester.       


      Even the day before, I was already thinking of whom to have lunch with. Surely, it wouldn’t be nice to eat lunch alone. I’m glad that a group of friends took me in and one of them was my seatmate back then. I wouldn’t want to name names….yet, but I know that whoever will read this would immediately know who I am talking about. I cannot remember how I manage to click with this group, but all I can remember is me sharing all my break times with them until the end of the semester. I would say I had fun with them and it is a memory I will forever treasure. In this group I met the woman whose interest was mostly just like mine. I don’t know how it happened but thinking about it now, it made me feel that I’ve known her all my life and not just last semester.            

  Days passed by and it seems that each day becomes harder to deal with. Projects are everywhere and deadlines are there to meet; a lot of lessons to study plus a thesis that made us all very busy. It feels like each day, I am trying my best to make both ends meet.  


            Half of the semester went by and I could say that it went okay. It was tough but I was able to make it. Little did I know that my true struggle would start just right after the first half of the semester ends.             


      I don’t know if you will agree with me, but I say it just happened that there are people that you will never be able to feel at ease with; and there are people who would never be satisfied with you no matter how hard you try your best. For them it would never be enough and they will never be able to understand you no matter how hard you try to win them. This was the biggest burden I had in my college life. It was the point that I wake up every morning wishing that everything would be over really soon. But it seems that the more I try to wish it was over, the more it gets longer. This was the time that I even thought of quitting but good thing “she” was there. Next to God she is my arm of strength when I feel like I’ve lost it all. She was the one to push me up when I am feeling down. She was the hope I hold on to when I was ready to give it up yet she wouldn’t give it up for me.  She said that she wouldn’t let me give it up for as long as she can help it.  She was standing right beside me during the greatest confrontation that I have to face. She need not be there, but she was, for she knows even without me saying that I needed someone who would understand. She accompanied me in fighting my battles like a lawyer ready to defend his client any time. I am not very emotional, but every time I remember that particular page of my book (my life) I can’t help but smile and cry; not for the pains but for the joy of being blessed of a friend like her. I could say that I was able to surpass all the trouble I’ve been through because she was there. Maybe I could still make it without her, but I know that the battles I went wouldn’t be as successful if it weren’t for her and her encouragements…


   I can’t say I manage all of them with flying colors because I know and even she knows how those struggles affected me as well as my studies but I would say I went through it all successfully because I manage to pick up the fallen pieces of myself  again. Aside from that, I manage to know someone whom I know will forever be there for me. I don’t even have to call her for her to be there. She would just stand right beside you just when she knows you need her. I always know that it feels good to be a comfort of a friend, but now I’ll say that it feels better to be comforted by a friend who truly understands.          


     She’s a great woman because behind her lies a great character. I could remember when I learned that (I hate to say this but I need to ) well, I failed. Everybody give me that pity look and I hated it. When you’re miserable, you don’t need people who would make you feel more miserable. It’s disgusting. That’s because they pretend that they understand you when in fact they really don’t. And that is what I like most about her. She wouldn’t tell you “it’s okay” when she knows that it’s not okay. Instead, “she’ll say everything will be all right. I know you can do it. You can handle it.” She won’t give you pity because she knows you don’t need one. She would tell her opinion on you or things about you straightforward and not on your back. Sometimes she can get a little bit tactless but that’s just the way she is. She is someone you get what you see. She would never pretend just to please you. She’s the type that when you are in doubt if what you are what wearing suit you, ask her and she wouldn’t tell you it looks nice just because it is what you wanted to hear; she would say it doesn’t look good if it was what she thinks. I often tell her she’s mean but I know she knows I am just kidding. Sometimes it may look like she’s being mean but I’d say she’s just being real. And knowing the real “her” is a blessing I am yet to be thankful each time I think of all the things that happened.       


    I would never forget when on our enrollment when she decided to move to a different section. I was shock, those people were her classmate from the very beginning and I know, because I experienced it too, that it was a tough decision. At first I thought she was bored and just wanted to get the enrollment done but when she told me her reason, I was touched. I don’t know if she still remembers it but that was something I will never forget. I never had a friend who cared for me the way she did. I love my best friend but I’d say we haven’t been through the struggles I went through with her. If soul mates are true, I’d say she is that one for me. I thought I am strong enough, but she showed me that I could be stronger. She made me know what it feels to really “belong”. Sure I have friends too with my former classmates, I can even say that I am close to them but each of us have our own group of friends even though all of us is a big group of friends already. And I hate to admit it here but most of the time I just feel so out of place. Especially when everybody talks about interest mine just seem not to jive with theirs especially when they talk about rock bands, mtvs, shows and stuff – things that may seem simple but still matters because when they start talking about stuffs like this, I just couldn’t relate. Don’t get me wrong, I know they are my friends, I love them and I don’t have anything against them. I know that when I have a problem I can still call on them; it’s just that with her, it is totally different. It feels like I’ve known her all my life and that I don’t have to worry about anything because I know she will be comfortable with whatever I am, whatever I do and whatever I say. And I believe I haven’t thanked her yet for all the things she did for me. And I would like to take this chance to tell her how grateful I am for getting to know her.              

      Before I end this piece, I would like to thank her friends who became my friends too; Bebeth, a very beautiful and sweet lady; I know you cared for me too. And I am thankful. It was you who made it possible for me to get at ease with the new path I threaded. Before,  I said to myself that it’s good to know that at least I am with someone familiar but now, I’d say that it’s good to know that I’m with a friend. Melody, you’re very intelligent. If there are people among you guys that I have no doubt would be successful, you would always be one of them. Thank you for appreciating the effort I exert to accomplish our project and for being a good listener. Also, I would like to thank Mina, and Rose Ann we may not be very close but still I would like to thank you for the times we shared together, and for listening to my unending sentiments.           
      Now, to the woman behind the tough character, I hope you like this. This is my appreciation, my token for everything. I could honestly say that the day I met you, “I found a friend, and a friendship I pray will never end.” JUDITH, wherever our roads bring us, you will forever be special to me. Time may pass; leaves may change from green to gold, the sky from blue to grey; there would be sunlight and sunset ahead of us, summers may change to sparkling rainy days but if there’s one thing that would always stay the same, it’s the friendship I have with you. And whatever happened, I hope you will never forget that you have a friend that loves you in everything that you are. And I will always pray that God grant you the success you are aiming for and I wish that someday I will also be able to lend my hands to you…   


         And if in the near future we’ll part ways which probably will, I’d like you to keep this song…. 



We hardly shared a glance
to greet and know each other
and now the time is up the band is packing up
We’ll find another chance
 to meet again together
and fill each other’s cup
 I feel like breaking up
It’s this time that almost always makes me cry
before we say goodbye
I need to let you know I love you…

Thank you for playing my music
and thank you for singing my song
thank you for sharing a moment
’cause with you I feel I really belong

 Thank you for keeping me company
and thank you for being my friend
and if our paths should cross somewhere someday
 I’d love to sing this song again

 I pray the Lord our God
richly bless and keep you
together let us call
and thank Him most of all
Somehow I’m feeling sad
I know I’m gonna miss you
I know I will recall
this warm and cozy hall

Still there’s one more thing before the day is done
before the lights are gone
before the curtain closes, let me…

 Thank you for playing my music
and thank you for singing my song
thank you for sharing a moment
’cause with you I feel I really belong
Thank you for keeping me company
and thank you for being my friend
and if our paths should cross someday
then I’d really be glad, yes ill really be glad,



november 9, 2007       

One response »

  1. Sometimes the people you least expect to be in your life, will be the ones who’ll always be there. This made me tear up a bit. Suddenly missed my bestfriend back in the Philippines. Thank you.


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